Each day during the month of March we will be sharing a devotional from a booklet written by Steve Love. Steve is a member of Canton First and a Traumatic Brain Injury survivor. If you would like a complete PDF of this devotional, it can be downloaded here.
Day 9
John 19:25-27 (New International Version)
25 Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother, his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. 26 When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing near by, he said to his mother, Dear woman, here is your son, 27 and to the disciple, here is your mother. From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.
Jesus was nailed to the cross and was about to die. He sees his mother, his aunt and two other women named Mary. John the brother of James, one of the sons of Zebedee, was standing near his mother. Jesus tells his mother “Here is your son.” He then addresses John telling him “Here is your mother.” Being the oldest son of Mary, it was Jesus’ reasonability to the needs of Mary. From that day on, John welcomes Mary as part of his family and saw to her needs.
Like all mothers, Mary met the needs of Jesus, his brothers, and sisters when they were young. Our parents are the first caregivers we have in life. Today many parents are still the number one caregiver for their adult child with a brain injury. The needs of the person with a brain injury are overwhelming and can become the focus of the home. As the person with the brain injury, we add to the problem. We do not mean to do it, but we do. It is hard for many of us not to have a self-centered focus.
Our caregivers do have needs. I might not understand their needs; they are different from that of the person with a brain injury. Some of their needs are the same one we face. The caregivers need someone who understands the problems they face. Support groups are a vital help for the person with a brain injury and their caregivers. A support group that ministers to the emotional needs of both the person with a brain injury and their caregiver becomes their lifesaver. I work with two support groups. It is a wonderful blessing when someone new comes and you see in their eyes that they now know they are not alone. The person with a brain injured helps the others who have a brain injured. The caregivers help the caregiver that is beauty and the idea support group.
Even from the cross, Jesus saw His caregiver, His mother and remembered her needs. Jesus made the provision to meet those needs for Mary. We survivors need to take his example to heart/mind, make it part of our long-term memory and see to the needs of our caregivers and loved ones.
Our caregivers need to recharge their personal lives by spending time away from us. Many married couples do not stay together after one of them receives a brain injury. The pressure and demands on them become to overwhelming and the only way they can think to save themselves is to seek a life away and to separate themselves from the injured. Parents find their once married injured survivor now their responsibility. Out of love for their adult child they renew their role as the primary caregiver. Some parents in their 60’s and 70’s is still their child’s main caregiver. We need to remember our caregivers’ needs; they need time away from us and we must see to it that they have some. We must allow them the time they need and do what we can help them meet this need in their life. Jesus remembered his mother Mary while hanging on the Cross. We need to remember the needs of our caregivers.
Pray and thank God for the caregiver who love us and show their love by meeting our needs.
Pray and thank God for His love He has shown to both the person with a brain injury and the caregiver.
Pray and ask God to help our caregivers to take personal time away from us, help them not to worry about us, and give them the help they need.